9. I'm going to take a plane trip somewhere. I'm going to be comfortable. I'm not going to try to curl my body up into some tight, painful ball for the sake of some skinny bastard next to me.
But I'm going to buy an extra seat anyway. Just 'cause.
8. I'm still not going to dance at parties. Or sing at karaoke. But while I'm NOT doing it, I'll look good.
7. I'm going to be a Buffy the Vampire Slayer character for Halloween. I've always wanted to, but so far this guy has been my only option:
6. I will be more comfortable knowing that if I am ever put in a situation in which me and any companions are forced to cannibalize each other, I have at least as much chance as everyone else.
5. Go swimming.
4. Hang-gliding.
3. I'm going to call the Shogun's Tameshiyaku a fucking liar.
2. I'm going to buy a motorcycle and a muscle car and-NO! No, no, I'm just kidding. My penis is fine.
1. Shave off my beard. And maybe finally find that sandwich.
