10. Published a novel.
9. Tried more drugs than I actually have.
8. Owned a car.
7. Been given a Lifetime Consumer Award from Diet Pepsi and/or Smartfood.
6. Fought off a trio of drunken brutes with a combination of martial arts, brute force, and sharp wit.
5. Been so happy that I spontaneously broke into song in public, and the happiness was so infectious it led the entire neighborhood into the same song, which they somehow knew by heart just like me.
4. Been a super-villain.
3. Made more than $20,000 a year.
2. Could afford to buy a dresser that actually isn't the same dresser I was using in grade school.
1. Been smashed by Hulk. I've got it comin'.
1 comment:
I can SOOOO relate to #3.
When I was in college, and I told my Uncle I wanted to work for public radio, he said "you'll be making 20,000 dollars for the rest of your life. You might want to consider something else". I laughed at him because I thought he was exaggerating. He wasn't. At all.
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