10. It's fucking boring.
9. Race. Star Trek has always used their different alien races to distribute fluffy messages about racial harmony. But if you look a bit more closely, it's actually an extremely racist franchise in that every alien character is completely defined by his/her race. I mean, why is Worf so special? Worf is so special because, unlike other Kling-Ons, every now and then he doesn't feel like murdering someone. There's nothing else significant about his character. That's it. Everything about Worf revolves around the fact that he's a Kling-On who's different from other Kling-Ons because he was raised by humans. It's like watching a movie in which the primary message is "Hey look! A black guy! And he knows how to read!" Oh, and if you ever want to see that movie, it's called Finding Forrester.
8. Listening to Star Trek fans talk about how talented the Trek actors are. Please. If it weren't for NPR, Kate Mulgrew would be living off action figure royalties. And if it weren't for the fact that there simply was no other choice in casting Professor X, Patrick Stewart would be knocking on directors' office doors, begging to give BJ's for money. Make it so!
7. The Ferrengei - a bit of a disturbing example of Reason #9. Let's see, they're little, hunched over, rat-like people who do nothing but hoard money. Hmmm...greedy rat-people...that sounds like a stereotype I've heard before, where'd you guys get that idea? (*cough*Berlin*cough*)
6. The Borg. Everyone loves the Borg. Fuck the Borg. The Borg are stupid. The Borg are stupid because they don't live up to the hype. The Borg are supposed to be super Darwin machines. They adapt and evolve to any situation. One strategy doesn't work, they use another. Shoot 'em, and within seconds they'll figure out a way to render themselves invulnerable to your weapons. So...the Borg try to wipe out the Federation - WITH ONLY ONE SHIP. They get as far as Earth's very doorstep, wiping out everything in their path, but the Enterprise crew manages to foil their plans just in time (surprise!). So then what happens? Star Trek: First Contact. The Borg attempt to wipe out the Federation again, AGAIN with only one ship. And of course, again, they fail. So...tell me, if these guys are all super-adapto, and they nearly defeated an intergalactic empire with only one fucking ship, do you think the second time they might, oh I don't know, SPRING FOR TWO?!?!?! Hell, how about three? I know, I know, gotta be careful about government spending and all that, but I think three ships isn't too excessive.
5. Wesley Crusher. Do I need to go on? No I don't. Wesley Crusher.
4. They killed Captain Kirk by having a bridge fall on top of him. COME ON! It's KIRK! He should die either in hand-to-hand combat with some super cyborg samurai, or while having sex with that green-skinned dancing chick.
3. All the stupid doctors. Why do they even need doctors? All they do is wave glowy shit at people and they're fine. I could do that.
2. Every alien race is either extremely logical and robot-like, or extremely illogical and war-like. Why aren't there alien races that are just like, you know, all chill? "We're the Temlanians! We just kinda hang out. We have chips."
1. They let Whoopi Goldberg have a part. That should cover it.
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