10. No Hulk.
9. That whole thing about ordinary criminals refraining from their dastardly deeds for fear of Batman is an urban legend. In reality, they do more crap just so they can get beat up by him. They even have a points system in place. Five points for getting beat up by him, ten points if he hangs you off a roof and interrogates you, and a whopping 50 points if he cums on your face.
8. Because the justice system is weak and ineffectual. And there's only one of him, while criminals run legion.
7. Superman air-shuttles criminals from Metropolis to Gotham just to fuck with him.
6. It's called "Gotham." It pretty much has to have a lot of crime or else they'd have to change the name.
5. Glen Danzig.
4. All the Gotham criminals have figured out that if they want to do bad shit, just do it on Saturday night. No one knows why exactly, but apparently a lot of Gotham clubs host "Gay Night" on Saturdays.
3. Robin lets one out of every two criminals go for job security.
2. Apparently hanging people off rooftops, beating them up, trying to run them over with super-cars, or just chasing them down while dressed up as a bat all count as cruel and unusual punishment.
1. The criminals were ready to quit until the Joker brought back Hawaiian Shirt Friday. Fringe benefits promote retention.
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