10. "Going Postal." That was MY phrase. I started that. It was me.
9. I've had a lot of bad ideas. A lot of you have been victims of them. But did I EVER try ventriloquism? No. No I did not.
8. I have never turned anyone in to the House Committee on Un-American Activities. And I totally could've. Like my girlfriend. She made me join a co-op.
7. How much did you know about the Incredible Hulk before you met me? And now...? That's effin' RIGHT!!!
6. Why don't YOU come up with new top 10 lists every day! EVERY DAY! Without any repetition! Without ANY repetition! ANY!
5. That last really good idea you had? That was mine. You just don't remember because YOU NEVER! STOP! DRINKING! WHY!?!?!?! WHEN WILL YOU CHOOSE LIFE?!?!?!
4. Most of my lists are much funnier than this one.
3. Do you know how much embarrassing crap I've revealed in these stupid lists? You think I like talking about going to a dermatologist to get my zits taken care of at the spry young age of THIRTY-FOUR?!?!? I am Captain Transparent. My soul is Ziploc. If any of you ever accuse me of lying I'll...I'll...call Linda Carter. Who I had sex with. Yeah..
2. Every now and then when I pull the neck of my shirt up over my nose and just keep it there for a few minutes? YES! I AM smelling myself. And I'm not ashamed of that.
1. Why don't YOU come up with new top 10 lists every day! EVERY DAY! Without any repetition! Without ANY repetition! ANY!
1 comment:
Regarding number 5. Get fucked. Drink is better than life. *guzzles*
Cheyenne
PS-- word verification says for me to type in "Pallaphe" ... I disbelieve that as a word.
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