10. Ninjas have many more opportunities for consensual sex than pirates.
9. Pirates need boats and water. Ninjas kick ass everywhere.
8. Pirates can't sneak into the vents overlooking a girl's locker room and stay there for two weeks.
7. When Bruce Wayne decided to develop the skills he needed to purge Gotham of crime, he didn't look for Captain Crunch to train him.
6. Ninjas are eternal, while pirates are limited to a specific time of history. Seen any pirates recently? Of course not. Seen any ninjas recently? Well, if they're doing their jobs right, of course not.
5. Ninjas are more inclusive. If turtles can be ninjas, anyone can.
4. Ninjas are more versatile. You can't be a good pirate. But ninjas can be superheroes. They can be turtles and they can rap about staying in school and saying no to drugs.
3. Ninja diets are much more diverse, due to the presence of teeth and hence the ability to partake in solid food.
2. A ninja can give himself any bad-ass name, while pirates must name themselves after either the color of their beard, a missing body part, or whatever inanimate object they have used to replace the aforementioned missing body part.
1. Have you ever seen Orlando Bloom in a ninja movie? No. No, you haven't.
2 comments:
I think... you might be right. I was going to say "No, you're wrong because Pirates sing" but then i realized that singing doesn't really help their case.
Well yeah, they sing, but they sing pirate songs.
Ninjas sing too. They sing using a frequency that can only be detected by other ninjas.
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