10. He lost his TV remote.
9. All those doorknobs in Wayne Manor don't clean themselves.
8. Now with both Alfred and Robin, Bruce is finally able to fulfill his life-long dream of producing and starring in an on-stage performance of Family Business. Bat-Girl tried to do Broderick's role, but all the duct tape in the world couldn't keep her chestlies down.
7. Someone has to buy the weed. Whenever Bruce tries to get weed, they totally make him as a narc. He's gotten close a few times, but the Bat-Money-Clip always gives him away. He doesn't smoke dope of course, but they need something to wean Lois off the pain meds and Clark's too much of a hard-on to go buy it himself (you'd need them too if your throat had to deal with what hers does).
6. A really bad spur-of-the-moment business investment some years ago having to do with putting together a Gotham City boy band. He managed to give the rest of the group to Superman for his Metropolis boy band, but the Man of Steel thought Robin was too blasphemous (all the "Holy" this and "Holy" that).
5. The nuns at the orphanage had huge knockers.
4. Got a few hundred extra bucks in his economic stimulus check. Wayne Industries was saved. Take that, LexCorp!
3. Taking sidekicks out for walks is a great way to pick up chicks.
2. Couldn't figure out what ROFLMAO meant. He thought it was a message from the Riddler.
1. Batman and Robin work at night. Batman dresses all in dark colors. Robin's uniform looks like a package of life-savers. Who do you think the bad guys shoot at first?
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