10. They generally have more money than me.
9. Easier to get drunk.
8. When they call me a "naughty" or "bad" boy, it's more convincing.
7. The fact that I have no car doesn't bother them. They used to walk their horses to school.
6. They cook better than young chicks.
5. Whenever I burp, they don't chastise me. They just figure they hit my back.
4. Spanking is more convincing.
3. Why read about history when I can get it from the source?
2. No uterus, no condom.
1. Whenever she dresses up as a nurse, librarian, teacher, George Washington, etc., it's more convincing.
2 comments:
"No uterus, no condom" has to be the dumbest thing I have read on here thus far, and I'm not kidding, for once. You should know better!
Shame on you, you bad, bad boy...
Okay, well first of all, if I meant even 10% of the shit I wrote on this blog, I would happily submit to commitment to Arkham Asylum.
Second, I wrote a week's worth of witty top 10 lists in one day. The fact that I even remembered to count to 10 is impressive in my opinion.
Third, do you really think I'm sending out negative messages to teenagers or something? I don't think any of the 2 1/2 people reading this blog are impressionable teenagers dating older women with herpes.
Fourth, I have - among other things - joked about taking sexually advantage of vampire women and murdering them afterwards. If you have no problem with that, you can't get all self-righteous-y. It's like going to a KKK rally and getting offended they didn't serve snacks.
Fifth, this is fifth.
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