Thursday, June 26, 2008

Top 10 Best Things About My New Apartment

10. No parents.

9. It's only a few blocks from my job.

8. No parents.

7. I've seen two of my neighbors so far, and they're both hot chicks.

6. I don't have a working doorbell, which offers an extra barrier to parents.

5. I have my own storage space.

4. It's only a few blocks from the comic book shop.

3. Gas stove. I don't trust electrical stoves. If you can't light your cigarette on it while singing your hair, it ain't a stove.

2. It's an attic apartment. Most of the windows don't have shades, because they don't need shades. No one outside a helicopter can see inside. So I can walk around half-nekkid as much as I want without traumatizing local children.

1. Lasers (seriously).

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